sometimes i'm even persnicketier.

Ahh. The sweet smell of Essex. How I've missed thee.

... Pretty sure it didn't miss me, though. Just a fair warning to all those would-be bicycle thieves running around London? I have a taser, and I'm not afraid to use it. You've been warned.

(That said, please don't try to steal my bike. I'm really pretty fond of it, and I'm about 80% sure that the seat is finally all molded to my ass and my ass alone. TMI? Probably, but I don't even care. It's my bike, dammit. Find your own!)

You know what I love? Comics. You know what I love even more? Cartoons based on comics. And I'm perfectly aware how prepubescent that makes me sound, but seriously. I love them, and I don't care who knows it. I grew up on Batman: the Animated Series, which is still the best cartoon ever, but this recent discovery of The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes has... rocked my world, more or less. And I may or may not be in love with everyone. Okay, that's a lie. I am in love with everyone. Ant-Man in particular, though. I don't know, he just reminds me of someone I can't quite place...

Huh, speaking of. I should probably stop watching cartoons and start packing. My lease is up in a few days. Honestly, it can't come soon enough.

How do they know? How do people just know? I don't understand. Do I look like a petite blonde? Do I sound like one? Do I give off some sort of feisty PI vibe that I've just completely unaware of? And does that vibe just automatically make me say yes before I fully know what I'm agreeing to?

Because otherwise I really don't know how to explain this.

I am so. Screwed. What am I doing. This is not good. Not good at all.

Hey, Thom. What's sexy, blue, and bigger on the inside?

Hint: it's not the TARDIS. But it is on your present.

... Jokes are clearly not my thing. I'll go back to my corner now. Carry on.

I think I've lost my mojo. Is that something I need to call Austin Powers about, or... ?

Another rape was reported on campus today. Another girl with 'slut' inked on her forehead. That's the third one in two months.

I didn't think things like this happened at Stanford. Guess I was wrong.

Now that I'm back at Stanford, I'm beginning to realize I didn't miss it at all. I hate the sun. Give me cold, wet, and rainy any day. Give me extra vowels in words like 'color' and c's instead of s's and z's. Give me liberty, or give me death.

... I think I lost my point somewhere along the line there. Whatever. This may be Veronica's dream school, but it sure ain't mine. Not anymore.

( Thom )

Hey. Hey, everybody. 'Tis the season. 'Tis the season for what, you ask? Christmas? Hanukkah? Kwanzaa, perhaps?

Not so. 'Tis the season for stanning. 'Tis the season for irrational rage and guaranteed disappointment. 'Tis awards season.

I fucking love awards season. Though my inner twelve-year-old girl is crying like a baby right now. No noms for Justin Timberlake, Golden Globes? I am disappoint.

Well, I'm on the wrong side of the pond for this, but happy Thanksgiving to those of you who celebrate it. Americans, eat some pie for me. And some turkey. Maybe some mashed potatoes. God, I'm starving. I hate you all.

But I digress. Enjoy your feasts!

Tumblr changed its entire layout today in honor of the teens recently bullied into suicide because they were gay. Did Facebook? Is that even a valid question? Please. Of course it didn't.

Fuck you, Facebook. You're worthless.

Normally I don't condone making light of something as serious as rape, but tonight I believe I have to make an exception. Because this? Is relevant to my existence.

My name is Ron Ellis, and I'll be your pop culture expert for as long as you people keep me interested. Cheers.

( I'm never getting married. You want an absolute, well, there it is. Veronica Mars: Spinster. )